Am I a mom who has it together? I’m not sure I can protest that just yet, but I sure feel like I’m on my way there instead of the road I was on – lazy, depressed, and overwhelmed with what to do next. I feel calmer about my mommyness and feel like I can accomplish most tasks on my own at home while my husband works to support our family. I was reading a forum post on Circle of Moms.com that asked about advice from those moms who have it together. I would have asked the same question a year ago, and here I am with some great insight into my momness now. Here is what I wrote.
“First of all, how old is your kido? That has everything to do with it. No mom has it all together the 1st 3-4 months of their first child! Secondly, it's all about routine and lowering your expectations. If you don't get the chores done in order to get a shower in, then you still rock! Children thrive on routines, because they love to know what is coming next and what to expect from their day. Even as a baby/toddler I tell my daughter what we are doing each day and why. This increases her speech development, cognitive development, as well as any anxieties she may have about what is coming up.
Lastly, it's all in the partner! My husband is fabulous about picking up the slack for me when I go to the gym or need time to decompress from a stressful day. He does a lot of one on one time with our daughter and she also thrives from these spontaneous moments with daddy!”
I would not be the on track mom that I am right now without my husband or my friends. I truly believe it takes a village to raise children, and know that if I don’t have it together one day I have people to call on to help me make it through the day. I try to remember that if the to-do list I write for one day last me for the whole week that the world is not going to end and that eventually it will all get done. Focus on your family first and then your expectations with expand to other areas of your life.